You probably know by now that I’m a trendaholic, trying anything out of pure curiosity and adventure. I am also an Aries, meaning I was born between March 21st and April 19th. Based on my research, it implies that astrologically speaking, I’m spontaneous, edgy, unpredictable and ready to fight anyone for no good reason.
After further research, I decided to go on an adventure and take you all with me by testing how much the astrology folks know about my personality. I tried a 5-day zodiac diet to see how it stacks up and interacts with my personality.
Zodiac Diet
My fire sign (Aries) matches my personality. I am painfully loud and unpredictable, even to myself. Luckily, there was one thing that I was in control of most of my life. That one thing is my diet and basically what I put in my body in general. I decided to test my astrological traits by challenging the only sane and predictable thing in my life.
DAY 1: Aries can be short-tempered, and they aren’t exactly good at hiding their anger.
First thing’s first, I needed to figure out a meal plan. Upon some extensive research, I found out that I was not allowed to eat meat, spicy foods, salt, and alcohol.
Which, if you ask me, was not okay at all. First, the internet tells me that I’m a human mess, and now they inform me that most of my favorite foods are a no-go. Someone, please tell me how to fight a recipe.
They did, however, indicate that my meals should mostly contain: brown rice, bananas, fruit juices, olives, tomatoes, onions, lettuce, cauliflower, cucumbers, spinach, radishes, broccoli, beans, lentils, pumpkin, walnuts, figs, dried apricots, garlic, and mustard.
Mustard? Really?!
So my first day went like this:
Fruit bowl + green tea for breakfast
Got angry
Veggie Buddha bowl and a soda for lunch
Took an angry nap
Butternut squash soup for dinner
Lunch was a bit tricky because I am usually impatient and full of energy, so taking the time to make a nice healthy meal felt like a punishment. But dinner took the longest, and I wanted to punch the recipe. Luckily, it all tasted terrific because I have the sleeping schedule AND taste buds of a baby now.
Disclaimer: If you came here expecting a full step by step journey with full recipes included, guess what, so was I. But by dinner, it turned into a rant post, and day 1 wasn’t even over yet!
Day 2: Aries is ultra-competitive and won’t give up without one hell of a fight.
Day 2 is supposed to be good. I survived one day of eating healthy foods, so I can probably keep this up a little longer.
I decided to be more open-minded about this challenge and give it a little more effort. During my research, I found that the reason I need to avoid spicy foods is that Aries are prone to heartburn, and we need foods that are cooling to support our liver and kidneys.
I had some oatmeal and blueberries for breakfast with some juice. While having the most important meal of the day, I was already planning my lunch. I chose to go with a chicken quesadilla and a salad.
The quesadilla was super cheesy and filling, and I never half-ass anything, so I sure as hell didn’t skimp on the cheese. As Ron Swanson once said, “never half-ass two things, whole-ass one thing,” and that has never felt more appropriate.
I decided to keep it light that night and had a lentil soup since it’s winter, and I was craving winter foods. This diet slowly started to feel less evil.
Day 3: Aries has a fiercely rebellious streak, and they like to do things their way.
During my research, I also found out that Aries can’t seem to stick to a routine when it comes to diet and exercise. They tend to get bored quickly, which makes sense for me because I keep trying new things almost every week for that exact reason. That means I had to eat something different and exciting every day to maintain this challenge.
I decided to look up some Aries inspired recipes and found some interesting ones like this amazing chorizo breakfast bowl. For a snack, I chose delicious blue cheese potato chips and a raspberry drink. As for dinner, I went a more straightforward route and made mac and cheese.
Overall, day 3 was a success, especially when you follow a simple recipe and not have to do all the planning yourself.
Day 4: Aries hates dull and repetitive routines.
At this point of the week, I was deep into the zodiac zone. From reading articles to watching TikTok videos, I became obsessed with understanding the astrology world to get to know myself better.
I truly enjoyed the day three Aries meal plan, so I decided to give it another go today and found some more recipes online that were easy to follow. Full of flavor and colors, just like an Aries would like supposedly.
I took the time to make a banana skillet flambé, which is a sweet treat that’s served with a BANG of roaring flames to match my fire sign. I followed my culinary zodiac adventure with a simple Mediterranean pizza for lunch by Half Baked Harvest.
For dinner, it was chicken fettuccine. I went with chicken twice this week because I needed the protein, and they never said no chicken on the list, so it’s a technicality.
Day 5: Aries can be short-tempered, and they aren’t exactly good at hiding their anger.
Today I decided to treat myself to some chocolate chip cookies despite being always told that sugar is bad. I still had some leftover pizza from yesterday, so after using up way too much of my time baking cookies from scratch, I felt like I should give myself a break and eat leftover pizza.
I may have been angry at myself and others through this entire process, but I have to admit, for an Aries, this was the perfect way to know more about myself and work on my imperfections.
This was my last day on this diet. The holidays were coming up and I knew there was no way I could resist holiday food. I chose to roll with the small victory of surviving a five-day zodiac diet.
As painful as it was at times, it turns out that the internet was right. Spicy has never been my thing, and my zodiac sign sure had a lot to say about me.
But are zodiac signs really that accurate, or do we just want them to be? I guess no one can answer that for sure, but the one thing I learned about my body this week is that my physical health goes hand in hand with my mental health, and it’s key to take care of both. Plus, damn girl, I made a banana flambé!
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